Worse, by comparison?

The only thing worse than having a tape where the doctor's voice is clear as crystal but there is a jackhammer noise in the background covering it alllll up...is the chicken-scratch writing he uses to fill in the blanks you left him.

Then he faxes it. On a yard-sale special. Running out of ink.

I just had to laugh...or I'd cry. I think I might be able to fill in two of the blanks out of, oh, 20 or so. Miracles 'R Us. That's me.

I wonder if he'd notice if I filled in every blank using Mad Libs for inspiration.

"Crohn's disease and FUZZY crypt abscesses with inflammation, enteritis, and colitis in the past. DARK BURGERS. She had a flare-up with active ileocolitis, where she actually needed surgery. She also was told to start SNOWING, but she did not want to because SNOT. She now continues to have about one to two bowel movements a day, which are liquid and BLUE. There is no blood. The patient has lower abdominal pain, which COVERS stool HIGHWAY GYN surgery, CUCUMBER diagnosis."

Criminy.

*NOUNS, ADJECTIVES, ETC. BY KITKAT. No lie. I shot her IM to give me random stuff.